Albatross
by psychodramabeautyfish
Summary: Iggy's thoughts after his major dissapointment in book 2 School's Out Forever, if you've read it then you'll know what i mean, i hope, if not then warning: SPOILERS WITHIN! For Gunnergirl cos she loves Iggy same as I do, yey Iggy!


This is for GunnerGirl because she has a soft spot for Iggy the same way I do I love him!

This is a little snapshot into Iggy's mind after his major disappointment of Book Two – School's Out Forever. If you've read book two then you can guess what I mean, if not then there are SPOILERS in this story so either don't read it or don't yell at me.

Song: Sympathy – Goo Goo Dolls

Last chance: SPOILERS!! FOR BOOK TWO - SCHOOL'S OUT FOREVER

Albatross

It felt great to be back in the air, thousands of feet above the rest of the world, cruising along at a gentle 70 and surrounded by my family. That is, my REAL family.

I'd been so ecstatic about meeting my parents, that I'd almost stopped thinking about the rest of the Flock, and then I'd agreed to stay with my parents. First I'd cracked up on them and almost got us busted by the police, and then I abandoned them, which right now is making me feel like a traitor, the worst traitor in the world. Like, ever.

_Stranger than your sympathy,_

_This is my apology,_

_I killed myself from the inside out,_

_And all my fears have pushed you out._

But maybe I'm the first one to realise this. Yea they were my parents but in the end… they were just this pair of strange adults.

_And I wished for things that I don't need,_

_(All I wanted)_

_And what I chased won't set me free,_

_(All I wanted)_

_And I get scared but I'm not crawlin' on my knees._

I'd chosen to stay with strangers while the Flock flew on. I 'm almost surprised that Max and the others took me back, especially Gazzy. God, at times I'm glad I'm blind. Just Gazzy's voice when we said goodbye was awful… I think I'd've cracked if there'd been a look with that voice. I can't live happily without my partner in crime.

_Everything's all wrong yea…_

_Everything's all wrong…_

_Who the Hell did I think I was?_

I'd wished for parents. Fuck we all have and still do. Loving parents who didn't give a crap if we were huge bird mutant freaks, who'd look after us and love us no matter what…

The dream had come true for me. I'd found my parents. They'd been great but stupidly quickly the Fame thing had worked its way into their brains.

I wasn't about to become a freak show for my parents' benefit! They wanted my wings more than me.

_And stranger than your sympathy,_

_Take these things, so I don't feel,_

_I'm killing myself from the inside out,_

_And now my head's been filled with doubt._

I hate adults. Only adults are whack-job whitecoats, only adults tormented us, only adults have hunted us (apart from Ari I spose…) and only adults can deliver such bitter disappointment.

After Jeb had betrayed us they'd all bloody followed his example. They thought they owned us like that lab rats we are.

_We're taught to live the life you chose,_

_(All I wanted)_

_You know your love's run out on you,_

_(All I wanted)_

_And you can't see when all your dreams aren't coming true._

I'm disappointed I admit it. The other's can still have their dreams but mine have been totally shot down. I want to go back to not knowing, and then I can still dream. It's something to cling too… but now I've got nothing…

_It's easy to forget…_

_When you choke on regrets…_

_Who the Hell did I think I was?_

I hated them. I really hated them, and now I understood how Gazzy and Angel had felt when Angel had said that their parents had willingly given them up to the whitecoats. I hated my parents maybe more than anything now, because I have fucking nothing.

_And stranger than your sympathy,_

_All these thoughts you stole from me,_

_And I'm not sure where I belong, _

_And no where's home and no more wrong._

Maybe if I was 100 human it would have been better, and I'd be with my parents right now… God I hate being a freak…

But if I wasn't a freak I wouldn't have Gazzy, Fang, Nudge, Max or Angel, and they mean more than anything to me because they're all I have. I'm part of the freak flock and that's how I want to be!

_And I was in love with things I tried to make you believe I was,_

_And I wouldn't be the one to kneel before the dreams I wanted,_

_And all the dark and all the lies were all_

_The empty things disguised as me…_

I'm glad to be back with the Flock I guess, but there's only so much disappointment I can take… I can still dream but now there's absolutely NO CHANCE of them coming true.

Maybe one day I'll be the only mutant left. The others will have found their familyies and there'll just be me, a white speck in the sky.

Flying Solo.

_Stranger than your sympathy,_

_Stranger than your sympathy…_

End.

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